Where Next?
Relationships dilute with distance
“Parting is such sweet sorrow that I shall say goodnight till it be morrow.”
―Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet
We like to talk about change cycles, preferably as an academic subject, and even more so when it’s about changing someone else.
When it comes to us, it’s different - when we find ourselves in “suddenly”, having spent a long time ignoring “gradually”, hoping it was an anomaly, and that life would return to normal.
Just about every study of change, from civilisations to businesses, traces a similar pattern of rise, maturity, decline, and renewal. Decline - the “long gradually” is characterised by reduced competitiveness, market saturation, sluggish growth and reduced influence. The transition to “suddenly” often involves financial crisis, technological disruption, leadership turnover and drastic restructuring efforts until a new cycle begins that is very different to the old model.
How long is “suddenly”?
Perhaps it’s the time it takes for a whisper to unsettle the soul, or perhaps just long enough for the world to change in a glance. Or maybe the hundred days it takes for a general acceptance in the West that the President of the USA is the leader of the free world, to create a whisper that unsettles the soul, for us to realise that life has changed, and we are not in control.
And also to breathe a sigh of relief that what we have been contemplating but avoiding now has to be dealt with, and that in dealing with it, we will find what has been missing for so long; the meaning, purpose and energy that brings growth of a very different kind to the tawdry model of “more, just more” characterised by a language of deals and threats.
Suddenly is now.
Something about values
Technology has given us an astonishing ability to be fed with huge amounts of information, in real time, through media designed to capture our attention for profit. It has a collateral effect, in that it creates an enormous amount of commentary by people on things they are unlikely to affect, in search of likes and recognition from people they don’t know, rather than doing the small, important things that will be noticed only by a few, but make a difference where it matters. It’s an old adage that in wartime it was good propaganda to say that people fought for Sovereign and Country, but the reality on the ground was they fought for the people around them.
Relationships dilute with difference,
Looking at the world of business, the same seems to apply right now. Once a business gets past a couple of hundred people, it is no longer a community with shared values.
Relationships dilute with distance.
The moment someone from HR puts posters with values on the website aor on the wall, it’s no longer a community. If they have to tell you what the values are, they’re not. Values are what we do every day, especially when no one is watching.
Relationships hold values, and dilute with distance.
The company we keep…
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Jim Rohn
As we look round, the values of those we associate with are on clear display, and we must choose who we want to be.
America is doing what it feels it must, but that does not mean we need to associate with it. Europe finds itself suddenly immersed in the cold bath of reality that has been filled by dependence on someone it thought a friend, but who is now turning up acting like a landlord - but finding the process, like a cold bath, strangely invigorating. Europe has forgotten who it is, even though it shows in its values everyday - a concern for society more than the individual, despite the cultural overflow from over the pond.
Meanwhile, China is doing what it has always done - playing the long game. India is finding its way into global political significance, and Russia is, well. it’s not clear yet.
Closer to home, the same applies. We become the average of those we keep company with. We need to choose wisely, because what comes next will be built on relationships, not logic or business models.
Relationships are what protect us, and they dilute with distance.